Just a question

Posted 1:47 PM by sean
I watch television sometimes. Usually I do it with a touch of guilt... actually, that isn't true at all, I don't feel guilty at all, but sometimes I worry that other people think I'm wasting time. I'm like a bear, I have to relax while I can, I'm storing up energy for, y'know, the seven lean years.

Anyway, I was watching television and an advert came and this poor businessman is getting hassled. There is someone at the door, knocking, and our businessman locks the door and hides. Someone is saying "how much software would you like to buy?" The guy eventually tries to break the window and can't and crawls into the false ceiling to get away from the guy trying to sell him software.

I had no idea that door-to-door salesmen were creating such anxiety in the world of business.

This ad, the one that interrupted my television watching, was trying to sell me software. I think. I don't know, I was so mystified at the apparent rash of inter-office door-to-door software salesmen.

I mean, here's the problem with spam and at-home calling and all of that. Television advertisers have figured out that you don't actually need to sell a product to sell a product. You have to make people laugh, or make people feel something, and then mention the product's name.

You can say "two thumbs up" all you want when advertising a movie, but even better is if you show all the jokes and then mention the movie's name. Everyone gets so pissed that previews give away the movie, but if they don't make you feel like you've seen a movie, you won't go. Studies that I can't cite have proved this.

Two previews out right now, one starring Jessica Alba (a relative newcomer and B-list star) and the other starring Meg Ryan (an established superstar). The Alba movie has all of this footage of her dancing and looking hot as frickin' hell. The Ryan movie shows her, out of focus and in a bath-tub, and the word "Sexy!" (from a Jeremy Lyons review or something) keeps popping up.

I'll bet you a hundred dollars that the Alba movie does better in the theaters. And I'll give you double or nothing that the Ryan movie is better and gets better Oscar buzz and better reviews.

If it is possible to send me spam that I enjoy, I'll enjoy your brand. I can't imagine what that would be, but you should do that instead of offering me guarantees about how much I'll enjoy my mortgage or breast implants.

Advertising plays is therefor damn near impossible. All we can tell you is what other people say about it, we can't make ads that make you feel the way you feel when you are in the theater. Kinda weird, and kinda cool, but the only way you will know if you want to see a show is by going to see the show.

Work

Posted 12:11 PM by sean
I was hanging around a group of actors the other day (an often unfortunate byproduct of being a theater person) and I overheard conversations about what people were doing with their weekend. Suffice it to say, not a one of them was going to see live theater.

This coming weekend is a bit of a stretch for us. Friday we're going to see "Days of Wine and Roses" directed by a good freind. (I apologize for the royal "we", Jordana and I will be doing all this stuff together. There tends to be two plurals in my life, me and Jordi and Gideon. This is just me and Jordi). Then on Saturday we are watching modern dance in Brooklyn in the afternoon and seeing week 3 of the Estrogenius Festival at night.

Our weekends aren't always like this, but we do try to at least support theater made by our friends. If they bother to make shows, we'll go see them.

And I guess that's my question, what I really want to ask with this blog. What are you doing? It's a huge question, because you kind of have to boil it down before you get to the meat of the thing. Also, it's more than the one question. What are you doing, and then, why?

If you say, "I work as a receptionist", that's obviously not what you're doing, you're making money for some other reason. If that reason is, "I have kids and a wife or husband and I love them," then, awesome. You're done.

But if you answer "I'm an actor" then I have to ask "why'? If you say, "because I love the theater, I love to act, I am an artist and this is how I communicate" then great. You're done.

However, if
1. You don't go see any other live theater, ever, unless you are hassled into going.
2. You are always trying to figure out how to turn the work you are doing now into a more commercial venture.
3. You are impressed as much or more by celebrity than you are by ability.
4. You hate rehearsal, and complain about the amount of time you have to spend making a show.
5. You complain about the space in which you are allowed to rehearse and/or perform.
6. You want to die when you tell a joke onstage and no-one laughs or you get done with a play and everyone describes it as "interesting".
7. You spend more time trying to get an agent than you do onstage or in class.
8. You are more excited about the prospect of getting a national Coke commercial than you are about working on a large role in a musty theater by an unknown but incredibly talented playwright.
9. You joined any of the unions the first chance you got...

Okay, okay, I'm ranting. But seriously, if that describes you, then don't tell me you love acting. You want to be famous, and that's fine, but there is a way of going about it.

I'm sure my dad always wanted to be famous. But he wanted to be a conductor even more than that. He took a job with the Cedar Rapids Symphony and worked with them for seven years, becoming a better and better conductor.

And y'know, he was never famous, never more so than locally. But he's a goddam great conductor. When he gets shoved up on the podium, which he has from time to time, in front of the world's best orchestras, he knows his shit.

And that's because there is always, and has always been, music in his house. He loves music. He'll be in the middle of something and music will be chugging away in the background and he'll stop and point at the speakers, frozen, with a big smile on his face. Three minutes will pass and you listen to what he's hearing and you recognize that on top of being an artist, he's a fan.

So, don't tell me there's no good theater going on. Don't tell me there's too much of it, there's no way of knowing what to see. Go to

theatermania.com
smarttix.com

and start looking through the lists. Read the synopsis. Find shows that are five dollars. You're never going to be famous, nothing you do will ever make a difference, your agent is never going to get you that national spot. *All* of our lives are interconnected, we are *all* working for five dollars a person, and all that can be counted, all that can be judged, is the exchange of ideas, the stories we tell.

So, for god's sake, go see a damn play.

Where is Raed?

Posted 11:29 AM by sean
http://dear_raed.blogspot.com/

I stumbled on to this once when Kent posted something from his blog. You should go and check it out, this is a blog kept by someone who lives in Iraq and speaks our language.

That is to say, knows how to write. Everyone speaks English.

Truth

Posted 1:12 PM by sean
I have two blogs I want to write, and I keep waffling on which to write first. I think I'm going to write the harder one.

Assessing information free from opinion is impossible. The whole idea that there is "information" is pretty screwy. The uncertainty principle is the only definite in this world, viewing information changes it.

Divorce brings this home, boy-o. If you think there is objective truth, try dismantling a marriage, even amicably. My parents have a mythology about one another that is thick as a rump roast, and my ex-wife and I have mythologies that are, y'know, flank steak thick, but there nevertheless.

I find myself having to assess information as if it were opinion in everything. Girls think I'm handsome, girls think I'm not handsome, for some reason they didn't all get together and agree one way or the other. About half the people who saw Dirty Juanita loved it, about 95% of the people who saw Lucretia Jones loved it, but I love them both.

It's important, I think, to continue to keep people close to you who seem to be working with a different set of facts. It's important because it keeps you intellectually alert. I am fascinated by people who are in favor of the war in Iraq, I genuinely want to know why. When people hate the art I create, I am genuinely fascinated by why. Everything I do, I start out thinking it is a good idea, I want to have knowledge as broad as possible so I can make better decisions in the future.

At a certain point, though, these people become more work than they are worth. Especially if they make decisions before there are facts. Mac, who has twice been featured in festivals honoring women in the arts, was told for years that he was misogynist.

It is sort of sad when you realize that you just can't listen to a person or a set of people. You strive and strive to maintain an open mind, but you can't stay open to gaslighting. It isn't necessarily that you are throwing pearls before swine, or anything that dramatic, but if you are listening to someone's opinion of your art or your life, and they actually dislike you arbitrarily, then you have to decide it means nothing to you.


**********
My first year at Carolina, I was sitting in a room talking with Mac and about ten of our friends. Everyone was talking about what a snob Jordana was, that she was transfering to a private school where people would understand her, that she thought she was so hot and smart. Mac, who knew her best, just laughed and said, "I don't know what Jordana would say, I think she would be amazed that you guys are taking the time to even discuss her."

And it's true. Ian and I have never talked about this, but there has been a lot of calories burned talking about what a pair of shits we are. It's just now occuring to me that these people might not be my friends.